Only after my elder sister got married and then moved halfway across the globe did I realize how terribly I missed hanging out with her. Of course, we fought a lot, like all siblings do, but in the end, nothing else can replace this bond.
Reddit user Lysin23 is missing her elder sister as she never meets her or her family without her partner now. When the original poster (OP) told this to her, the sister got angry as she felt that OP didn’t like her partner and was trying to exclude him!
More info: Reddit
RELATED:Sometimes, we form special bonds with our siblings, but not everyone puts effort into this relationship
The 26-year-old poster and her 27-year-old sister are both in relationships, but she never sees her sister without her partner
Even her family has not seen her lately without her partner, and she cancels plans if the poster and her mom want to have a girls’ day out
The poster really wanted to spend some time alone with her sister, so she told her so, but the woman got angry
She thinks that the poster doesn’t like her partner and wants to exclude him, so she doesn’t want him to come
Today’s story brings us a conflict that sparked among 2 sisters because one refused to meet the other without her partner. Our 26-year-old OP has a 27-year-old sister, and both of them have been in relationships for many years, so they bring their partners for family gatherings and outings. However, the poster’s sister never sees them without her partner!
That’s what is bothering the poster, because she really misses spending quality time with her and also girls’ time with their mom. When their mom wanted to go to the spa like they used to, the sister wanted to bring her partner, so OP and mom said that they wanted it to be just the 3 of them, but then that just made her cancel on them.
Another incident was when she gave OP a voucher for her favorite restaurant as a birthday gift, and our lady was really looking forward to it. However, when she reached the place, her sister was there with her partner and OP was quite disheartened by it. One time, she even tried talking to her sister about it, but it ended up being a fiasco as her sister got very angry.
Apparently, she thinks that OP doesn’t like her partner, so she accused her of trying to exclude him, and that’s why she thinks OP wanted to spend time just with her. Little does she know about how much the poster just misses her elder sister. Ever since their small tiff, OP has not even dared to bring it up again, but probably infuriated by it all, she vented online.
Netizens said that OP is stuck in quite a tricky spot and has to smartly navigate the situation, or she might end up ruining her bond with her sister. To get deeper insights on the matter, We reached out to Gazala Khan, a mental health counselor at an NGO called New Morning. She said that it’s common for priorities to shift when a person gets into a romantic relationship.
“But it becomes unhealthy when there’s emotional withdrawal from family, neglect of earlier bonds, or if the partner becomes a gatekeeper to all your interactions. In such cases, balance is the key. Connection should not feel like a trade-off,” she added. Gazala explained that OP’s sister may be overly dependent on her partner for emotional security or fear conflict in their relationship.
She elaborated that sometimes, it’s also about needing validation, low self-esteem, or feeling pressured to keep the partner constantly included to maintain closeness or avoid insecurity. In such a situation, our expert noted that working on one’s ways of communicating can be a good start for someone like the poster, or rather anyone stuck in a similar complication.
“One can start by expressing how they miss one-on-one time—without blaming. Suggest a sibling-only plan now and then. Keep it warm but clear. Boundaries work best when they protect connections and not control,” Gazala concluded. Folks pointed out that sitting down and talking about it sounds like the best solution in this situation, and frankly, even we agree.
What would you do if you were in OP’s shoes? Let us know in the comments below!
Netizens said that it’s quite a tricky situation the poster is in, but they feel that she should have a proper conversation with her sister
