If we’re going to be honest, these days, weddings are more like a high-stakes reality show. Between seating chart battles and cake disasters, there’s always someone getting the short end of the stick.
And in this case, it was today’s Original Poster (OP) who went from dedicated bridesmaid to unwanted guest faster than you can say “bridezilla.” After being told she was too unstable to be a part of the wedding party, her brother asked her to drive him to the venue, and her response was perfect.
More info: Reddit
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The author was supposed to be a bridesmaid in her brother’s wedding and was totally committed to supporting him and his fiancée
Image credit: tastyxcutie
So imagine her surprise one day when the fiancée informed her that she was being cut from the wedding party
Image credit: tastyxcutie
She explained that her brother had mentioned that she was struggling with her mental health and didn’t want her causing any drama
Image credit: tastyxcutie
This caught her by surprise, so on the morning of the wedding, when her brother asked her to drive him to the wedding venue, she refused
The OP had been all-in for her brother’s rushed engagement to his fiancée. She helped pick out the ring, listened to every pre-wedding crisis, and even endured a meltdown over napkin colors. She was all set to be a bridesmaid, complete with dress, shoes, and a front-row seat to the Pinterest-board madness. Then, out of nowhere, she got the boot.
Her brother’s fiancée called her up, crying, to inform her that her brother had decided she was too much of a mental health risk to be part of the wedding. Yes, the OP had a rough year. She’d gone through a breakup, therapy, anxiety, and depression, but she had been handling it really well. No drama, no breakdowns at family events.
Yet, suddenly, she was out, without even a heads-up from her own brother. She took it without a fight until her brother had the nerve to ask her for a favor. His best man had gotten sick, and now he needed her to drive him to the venue.
Her response was pretty much a masterclass in well-placed pettiness. She reminded him that since she was so unstable, she couldn’t drive. But this caused family members to accuse her of being petty and immature, insisting that she should be “the bigger person.”
According to the Mental Health Foundation website, people with poor mental health are often stigmatized and discriminated against. They state that it often stems from harmful stereotypes as many people wrongly assume that people with mental health conditions are unstable or dangerous.
PsychCentral emphasizes that being overlooked, especially by family, causes a different kind of pain. This is because exclusion isn’t just a minor slight; it can affect a person’s sense of belonging and self-worth. When one family member is consistently left out of important events, it reinforces feelings of rejection and isolation.
Regarding the OP being told by her family to be the bigger person after her brother excluded her from his wedding party, Thought Catalog emphasizes that the idea of “being the bigger person” is often a manipulation tactic that unfairly burdens the victim while protecting the perpetrator.
They explain that it’s rarely directed at those causing harm, rather only at those expected to endure it silently, being pressured into emotional bypassing and forced to ignore mistreatment for the sake of keeping the peace.
Netizens wasted no time in rallying behind the OP, applauding her response. They emphasized the importance of setting boundaries and pointed out the family’s double standards, questioning why they weren’t holding the brother accountable for his actions instead of guilt-tripping her.
In the end, most agreed: if she’s too unstable for the wedding party, then she’s definitely too unstable to be his personal Uber. Do you think the OP was right to set this boundary, or should she have just driven him anyway? We would love to hear your thoughts!
Her family called her petty and immature, but netizens strongly disagreed with that
