Few things reveal the true character of your friends as getting in trouble. Some stand by you and try to help, while others make excuses. But for Reddit user Current-Payment4613, it was actually what was supposed to be a joyful event that exposed cracks in his relationship with a buddy he had known since childhood. The guy and his fiancée had sent our Redditor an invitation to their wedding; however, his partner wasn’t included in it. After he contacted the couple to inform them about the mistake, they told him that it was a conscious decision.
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But this man recently poured his heart out on the internet, believing that his buddy doesn’t
Wedding anxiety is a real thing, but couples need to fight it
“The ‘plus-one’ meaning is when you allow your invitee to bring an additional guest of their choosing. On a wedding invitation, this is designated as ‘and guest.’ For example, the envelope might read: ‘Mr. James R. Smith and guest,’” says wedding and event planner Emily Coyne, founder of Emily Coyne Events. While a plus-one usually refers to a date or a romantic interest, it could also include a family member or a relative escorting an older guest who may need assistance, or even a close friend attending with a single person.
Not every guest gets one. Sure, if a couple has an unlimited budget and their venue comes with ample space, they could, in theory, offer every unattached guest a plus-one. However, for most, resources are limited, and that’s not really an option.
Coyne highlights that every case is different but, ideally, there should be some general fair principles when assigning the privilege. “Since this is such a delicate and personal choice, I highly recommend establishing your own ‘rules’ and showing consistency. For example, if one person in the wedding party is offered a plus-one, every single person in the wedding party should be offered the same thing. This eliminates any favoritism, which is never in style,” she explains.
After all, the wedding party not only gives the couple their time, love, and energy, but they also spend a lot of money on attire, lodging, and transportation, so they deserve a plus-one. Singling out your friend like that not only invites unnecessary tension into the ceremony but can taint the relationship in the future as well.
The fear that the wedding won’t be perfect is common. “I see this all the time with couples and disproportionately brides,” says Tom Couch, a luxury wedding planner and founder of Thomas Couch & Co. “They feel this pressure to look the best they have ever looked and also to have the ‘Best Day Ever.’”
However, this line of thinking doesn’t lead to anything good, especially when it hinders people’s decision-making.
“You’re just setting yourself up to fail. When you think about it; when are your best nights out? They’re usually the most impromptu, the least organized. So, I’m not saying you shouldn’t organize your wedding but you should stop thinking that it must be the best day and that you can somehow control that. You have to leave some things to the gods.”
As people reacted to the story, they also suggested that the author of the post should seek closure
